The Waiting Game

Around three weeks into Connie and I's relationship, we realised that there was one area of our matched personalities that we were vastly different - turns out that I am a very patient person and Connie is not. I would say she was impatient, but that sounds like an insult and it's a little more than that - she just doesn't like waiting. It was first discovered when stuck in traffic in Aberdeen, and that she didn't like waiting in the car, which I discovered was a major issue. Patience, it turns out, is something I have in abundance. I mean, I can wait ages for a train or a bus that I know will come. Connie can't and will chose not to.

And, you know what? Fair enough. Many people will paint this as a personality flaw, but it actually can work to her (or our) advantage. Boarding an aeroplane after our wedding last year Connie was a little nervous about fitting our two carry on cases (for our sins) and her wedding dress onto the plane and in the storage areas. I was all prepared to wait until we were told our section was boarding (we were in the front half of the plane's seats, which would mean waiting for the back section to be filled, giving us little time to get in a situated our selves). The waiting at the gate for a plane is where Connie's patience is truly tested, and she decided to go and plead with the gate staff, who then let us on with the infirm and children'ed people before the rest of the passengers like royalty. 

Now, if you're clever and read the blog at a level above casual, you'll notice that I posted this post announcing our pregnancy back in January 2014. Assuming for the moment we waited for the 12 week scan (at least), that was 28 weeks ago. Putting those two together and you'll get 40 weeks: 40 weeks, the length of a pregnancy. If I tell you that our 12 week scan was actually on our 13th week due to changing hospitals, you'll also realise that we are now a week "overdue".

Here's the thing - being overdue is a very very common thing. In fact, the majority of births, especially from first time mothers, are late by four days or more. And the other thing is that the due date is as amorphous a thing as you can imagine, being based entirely on assumptions and averages, and almost all births are not on the due date. The exact measurement methods include ovulation, period timing, and a whole range of methods that are very different for each pregnant woman. One major part of hypnobirthing was the education around the due date and that inducing the birth isn't something that should be the go-to tool to use if you're overdue, because a baby will come when it's ready, and bringing it along "earlier" than that might not be the best for you or the birth experience.

That being said, going to 12 to 14 days over isn't reccomended, as that is then outside of the window of error for the due date, and then discussions will be had. We're okay with this.

You know, if our child is reading this back (a post that I am drafting right now as well) let it be said that this isn't a problem and we aren't annoyed OR impatient - in fact, the only reason I am posting this is to try and tempt fate, to bring the birth along a little quicker. The only reason we would be impatient is to meet our child, someone we've been waiting for over 40 weeks to meet, and that it will be pretty great. It's funny, being on the edge of parenthood, within touching distance of it, and still not being there.

A weird existential limbo, but a good limbo to be in.