In Front

Since moving to England our new house is the only one of about 20 or so on our street that has a driveway. There are dropped kerbs in front of it, so it’s not a fake one just haphazardly added, and it’s actually a right of access for not just for our home, but our direct next door neighbour who shares the access, but not the driveway – we have to leave a “wheelie-bin’s width” to the left of the driveway, for access to Number 4. That’s fine, as there is ample space in the driveway for two cars and this access, and seeing as we only have one car, for now it’s okay.

Except the rest of our neighbours evidently struggle for spaces. The cars parked outside shuffle around like deck chairs on the Titanic, with the same ones appearing every night but in different places. There’s the van sized taxi. The black driving instructor Citroen DS3. The Mitsubishi ASX that I keep eyeing up as a new car for us. And then there are the d--kheads who park in front of our driveway.


This first happened the week we moved in. One night I noticed that there was a car parked over the driveway, but not blocking my car. I wondered why someone would park there, and then by the morning it was gone, vanished before I could passive aggressively put a note on the car. And, by George, there would have been a note placed on the car. Then, a few weeks ago I woke to head to work early and there was a blue Fiesta this time parked in front of not just the driveway, but also in the way of the car. To get out I had to swing the car around the miscreant, so before I left I popped a note on the car simply saying DO NOT PARK IN FRONT OF THIS DRIVEWAY. We heard nothing back, but this car’s a regular and I’ve seen it now parked a fair bit away from our driveway.


Then a different car parked there, this time encroaching not just on our drive way, but also blocking the wheelie bins who were put out the night before. This one was far worse too – the Fiesta, as you can see, was poking it’s nose out. The Astra this time was barely even fitting into the space. By this point I’d resorted to parking in the middle of our driveway, to try and avoid these nose-poking b-stards, but even this time the Astra was poking out enough to give me pause and mean that I have to wrench the car around it.

It is a matter of principle right now. We pay rent for the driveway, as it’s part of our product and rental agreement that we get parking. If someone blocks it for us, we are no longer getting what we are paying for. It’s more annoying when you consider the fact that if we did have two cars there’d be no way to get either car out if someone blocks just one of them, as then there’s no space to make the miniscule movements needed to free the car from it’s prison. I’ll go nuclear if we do get a second car and someone blocks us in.

In the mean time I’ll be fastidiously putting notes on cars telling them to stop, and if I see someone who is getting into one of these cars I will pull them up on their inconsiderate behaviour. I’m not having Connie, in her new Mercedes Benz A-Class coming home at night and being unable to park in our driveway because some plank has parked in the way.

The annoying thing is that the law isn’t even on my side (technically). It does state in the Highway Code, under Rule 243 that “DO NOT stop or park where the kerb has been lowered to help wheelchair users and powered mobility vehicles or in front of an entrance to a property” but sadly that’s not a “MUST NOT” like the yellow line parking rules. So I’m just going to keep tabs on them by posting passive aggressive (but polite) notices on the cars and posting their pictures on this blog.

That’s how I roll.


So after this posted today I went home to find this in the drive way. And the car parked further up the road. Our neighbours are great!