The Way That I Think

See me? I am a tiny bit crazy. Not mentally insane, but just a tiny bit crazy in the head. I am not sure where I get it from, but it might have to do with my upbringing. It's not to say that I am blaming that, oh no, as I wouldn't trade my craziness for anything in world, no, that would be far too boring, but I do think they way that I think is particularly insane.

Pointed out to me by my girlfriend, I have thought about the way my thoughts seem to work and when sitting talking to someone my mind will burrow down some of the strangest pathways, shortcuts and stretches of thought that are so wildly off topic I can't even begin to describe them. For example, since writing this I have thought about Dumbo, Pretzels, Driving in the UK and Life jackets all while typing those first two paragraphs out.

It becomes tiring. It really does. And this is the reason that I think I find certain things that other people might find boring very relaxing. Recently I have started sketching cars again. A long time ago, when I young, I used to sketch a whole range of fictitious cars. These days, I am just sketching out the shapes of them. I also used to draw intricate maps of fictional cities that must border on crazy levels of detail. I also used draw fake mobile phones.

I see these activities as a strange way to focus myself, to clear my head of spurious thoughts, and cleanse my soul for a while. It acts as an almost cathartic experience in which I can shut out the rest of my burning thought processes. I think computer games do this to my mind too better than TV of films.

People around me, close to, probably have realised this already. It must be infuriating to find that I have wandered along a new conversational path without a moments notice - but hear this; I am trying to tame it, stop it, and arguably master it.